I’m a strong believer that we should leave the world, and the people we touch (as much as possible) in a better state than we found it. We should not pass our damage down onto our children, but lesssen or remove it as possible. Every generation should hopefully be better than the last. And I see that (with the exception of politics) that many of the people I know, love, interact with, and read about seem to at least feel the same way.
Fiona O’Loughlin is one of my favourite comedians. I love her stories, her honesty and most recently her book, “Me of the Never Never“. There was one passage in particular that resonated with me:
As you cross the Todd River, Aborigines are in full view always, sometimes drinking, sometimes fighting, but mostly just sitting. I think it would be fair to say that it is usually in the car when you’re crossing the river that urban Alice Springs kids, black or white, will ask their parents for the first time about the Aborigines in the river.
‘Why do those people sit in the river all the time?’
To my mind it is a crucial question that requires a crucial answer and it can go either way.
‘Because they’re drunks.’
‘Because they’re bludgers.’
‘Because they’re no-hopers.’
I guess, as is often the case, racism comes as much from ignorance as malice, but right at that moment you can either pass on intolerance or not, and it’s such a heavy load to hand onto a little kid. A kid that may well spend his or her life in Central Australia has been given with authority a very heavy sack of fat, pompous, pious prejudice.
‘Why do those people sit in the river all the time?’
‘I don’t know, maybe they’re waiting.’
‘Waiting for what?’
‘Waiting for better days, I think.’
Simple.
And I thought after reading that passage, “Yes, that’s exactly it – we shouldn’t pass racism, homophobia, biphobia, transphobia, queerphobia, or sexism onto children.” We should shelter them as much as possible from these things, let them know that they exist, because otherwise it’d be a nasty shock when they encounter them, but to not teach our prejudices to our children.
Of course, this is really a hard thing to do. Easy for me to say as a woman who hasn’t managed to successfully have children, hard for a parent whose children want to know what their parents thoughts are on various issues. I don’t envy parents in this regard.
But if we could shelter children from the structural sexism, racism, and homo, bi, trans* and queer phobias that exist in society, or at least get them to question themselves and others when these things are presented as facts wouldn’t that make the world a better place?
One Reply to “The legacy we leave”